AM I GOOD ENOUGH?
A live example of on-the-spot EFT Tapping
I read Benjamin Hardy’s newsletter this morning: 35 Things
- Believing You’re Not Up For the Challenge
Just as we deceive ourselves into believing something will make us happier than it will, we also deceive ourselves into believing something will be harder than it will.
The problem with dread and fear is that it holds people back from taking on big challenges. What you will find — no matter how big or small the challenge — is that you will adapt to it.
++++ My response++++
A constant refrain in my head is, “Am I good enough?” It’s here again this morning.
Another member of our church choir is a lyricist. He wants to collaborate with me to compose melodies and accompaniments for his lyrics. He gave me a copy of many of his lyrics. They are really quite good.
They are also mostly love songs reminiscent of pop standards of the 1920’s-60’s. The rhymes are clever, the poeticism rings through, the rhythms are catchy. Jazz overtones run throughout.
My own musical skills tend towards classical, not pop. Or jazz. I am painfully aware of how limited my stock of chord progressions is.
Correction, I feel ASHAMED of how limited my skill set is.
Even though I feel ashamed of my lack of chord skills, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Well, that’s a lie so far.
Repeat and tap.
What if this is just an EXPERIMENT?
Repeat and tap.
I almost bagged out of meeting with Ned. I could have done that. I could still call him and tell him I changed my mind. Do I want to? What DO I want?
I want to step through life no longer bound by FEAR.
How many times have I written that, told a friend about it? Answer, “Lots.”
And here it is again. Do I let the fear decide for me? Or do I try the experiment?
I feel embarrassed to have been a musician all these years and I still don’t know more advanced chord progressions.
I will feel embarrassed in front of Ned.
Well, there’s a STORY for you. I have so little data on composing with a lyricist, there can be no accuracy in my prediction.
Wait! I do have a data point. Oh, it was awful. Well, a failed experiment for sure. That guy was so disappointed with me – in 1976.
How does one decide these things? Am I stepping beyond the fear or trying to be something someone else wants me to be?
OK – two hands, palms out, in front of me. Ned in one hand, “skip it” in another. Hmmm, I expected them to be equal. Ned is slightly heavier. Oh, wait, it’s changing. Now “skip it” is getting heavier. This feels weird.
OK, I AM curious. What does it take to collaborate with a lyricist? Could I be of any use to him? Do I have some previously undiscovered composing talents?
Um, it is bound to be embarrassing. I’ve heard that one only FEELS like dying from embarrassment. Not actually fatal. Not worth canceling opportunities. I’ve spent a lot of effort to avoid situations that might result in embarrassment. Shameful to be less than perfect, you know.
Something I “should” know – that chord progression that deals with chromatic melody passing tones. I’m not sure how to state a google search for that question. It’s a common musical treatment. I know it when I hear it – and you hear it a lot in cabaret standards.
I’d LIKE to know what it is. But I’m not going to need it this afternoon when I need it.
No, I don’t have all the skills this seems like it will need. But I’m missing so much other information about the process. About what Ned needs. About what maybe I DO know. And I like discovering.
OK, so today is an experiment. Failed experiments yield useful information.
I’m keeping the appointment.
Embarrassment, here I come.
ABOUT EFT TAPPING
*I’ve done EFT Tapping for over 15 years now. Most often these days, I just pop in a short version when an emotion spikes:
1) Set-up statement (those typed in italics) while tapping on the “sore spots”.
2) A round or two, tapping on all the other points – maybe saying a reminder word, maybe saying nothing
3) When my mind wanders, I figure that emotion has reduced and I follow the wander.
HOWEVER – the benefit of working with a practitioner, and not just yourself, is that they pull you back to the original emotion until it is thoroughly resolved.
Your mind does NOT want these issues stirred up. These fears were hidden away to keep you SAFE, to keep you ALIVE. You were young. You had few options. Ever since, the mind’s job has been to maintain the (seemingly) precarious balance of protections to ensure that survival.
Your mind will distract you from the issue at hand. Wandering thoughts are to be expected. An EFT practitioner asks you to monitor the intensity of the emotion so you can tell whether distraction or resolution is occurring.
In between appointments, you can do a “light tapping” to quickly ease tension yourself. If the issue persists, consulting a certified EFT practitioner creates deeper resolution.
For more information about EFT Tapping, click on the menus at the top.